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Gift of Life
President Guo Ying-Lan of the CTK Foundation
He is Ta-Kuan, a little angel, hero and a guide in life.

      I lied on the operating table in the delivery room where doctors and nurses already had their operation tools ready. Reporter Ms. Yang Hui-Mei of Tzu Chi Great Love TV and Brother Chou Ming-Wen also had their cameras set up. Ten-year old Shang-Kuan stood aside with an excited heart. The brother he missed so much will come back again to accompany him.
      He has been waiting for this moment for ten months. I could feel that the air was filled with a joyful atmosphere of welcoming a new life, but still my heart was disturbed. I was anxious whether the new life in my belly should be healthy. Even though the amniotic fluid examination during my early pregnancy did not find any abnormality, before the child was born, who could guarantee that it is a hundred percent healthy?
      A ten-month torment was almost over. The moment that I had been expecting day and night was here to happen, but this short wait was as long as a century. I was so nervous and cold sweat kept popping out of me. I tried hard to control myself to hold back the anxiety. I closed my eyes, chanting Na Mo Guan Shi Yin Pu Sa silently in my heart. I prayed that she would bless my child to be delivered safely. Shang-Kuan held my hand tightly as he stood by my side and said, “Mommy, don’t worry. We’ll soon see brother.”
      First, the anesthetist injected medicine into my spine near the waist, and pinched my thigh and abdomen and asked, “Do they hurt?” I shook my head, then I felt my belly was sliced open by the obstetrician. The doctor’s surgical hands were very delicate. Soon my child was taken out.
      “Wow! My brother is back! My brother Ta-Kuan is back!” I heard the exciting shouts of joy from Shang-Kuan. He is the first one to meet with his brother. He saw the entire operation process in the delivery room and he witnessed the secret of life. What has made him even happier is that his darling brother comes back again to accompany him. He shall no longer be feeling lonely again. There is no word to describe how happy he is at this very moment.
      “Mom, congratulations, it’s a boy.” The nurse held the baby to me. This was the first time I saw it. What a familiar face, chubby pink cheek, slightly-opened eyes looking upward like he’s smiling. My child, thank you for loving me so much. You came back again to accompany me and let me feel the joy of becoming a mother again. Your returning has poured a new spring of life into my fallen heart. Do you know, Ta-Kuan? It is mommy’s greatest regret in life that I was unable to cure you. This kind of regret can never be recovered no matter how guilty or sorry I felt. Maybe, to have you delivered again is the way of making it up. As long as I live, I will protect you well so you can grow up safely. Thank you, Lord, to bestow me such a wonderful angel. This is really a miraculous blessing!
      Nature rotates in four seasons; human life descends through birth, aging, illness and death; life is a course of changes that are put together section by section. During these changes, we will meet all kinds of situations, life or death, health or illness, success or failure, fulfillment or frustration, gathering or separation… Each situation brings us a different feeling. These are precious gifts in life that Heaven gives us. During the changes, when undesirable situation occurs, if we can endure and are willing to put up with it without complaining “Why it’s me?”, then such attitude will allow us to pass through all challenges very quickly and turn bad luck into good luck. More blessings and life miracles will come to us.
      Ta-Kuan, I once hated the Creator for his cruelty to let you fall ill; Ta-Kuan, your leaving made me feel even more painful. But when I looked at our connection between a mother and son from another angle, I found how much you had loved me. You knew I could take on such “torment” and you had chosen me in particular. Thus, a miracle in life appears and life’s great love expands. It is all because of you that courage to survive and struggle derives from countless illnesses and deformities, countless disappointment and frustration, and then we realize the preciousness of life and the significance of having it cherished.
      Ta-Kuan, from you I have seen the “loving kindness, compassion, joy and release” and realized that “being able to release does not mean heartless” and “being unruffled by emotion means the real affection.” You had shown life’s sufferings and impermanence through your illness. Your compassionate wish is that of Bodhisattva that shows tremendous compassion for all beings. You had gone. You didn’t take with you whatever forms of objects in this world, your body, books that you liked, violin and toys, but left countless love and unceasing hope that had accompanied numerous hearts to go beyond sufferings and learn to grow up. Ta-Kuan, either you are in another far-off country or come back to me with another body, this love shall always be kept in the corner of my heart and continue to encourage me to fulfill your great wish of comforting all suffering beings.
      In the dark night, I raised my head to watch the sky. In the far-off night sky, there is this little star which keeps glowing its light to shine the sky and guide the path for those home-returning people late at night. Watching them walking safely, this little star smiles. Its bright smile shines the night sky even more blazingly.